The Leadership Imposter!

Have you ever had that feeling of being an imposter in your job role? Ever thought… ‘they are going to find me out soon, I’m such a fraud!’ Maybe you’ve felt like you’re getting away with something and about to be found out? Well don’t panic, you’re not alone!

Very often, our journey into early years leadership takes a similar path; great practitioners are promoted into room leaders, up to deputies and then we reach that pinnacle position of manager.

Yay! Wait, What? I’m now managing people and budgets, responsible for all these little people, safeguarding, wellbeing, payroll, risk assessments, compliance……whoooooah, stop the bus, I want to get off!!

Managing an early years setting is like nothing you will have ever imagined and there will be times when imposter syndrome well and truly kicks in. But what is imposter syndrome and how can you manage it?

Imposter syndrome is an internal fear of being a fraud, regardless of how successful, confident and accomplished you appear externally.

Imposter syndrome shows itself in many ways including:

Overworking: How many times have you stayed over when your shift has officially ended, just to send that quick parent email or to check the new EYFS draft one more time? Maybe you continue to over prepare for a meeting the next day or you go over and over what you are going to say in the staff disciplinary meeting? Are you working at weekends and in the evenings just to make sure you get things right?

Perfectionism: Does everything have to be perfect before you will let it go? Perhaps the staff notice board isn’t quite up to scratch, the environment not quite perfect or the lunch not served precisely how you would like? Being too perfect can make the rest of your team feel inadequate, that their hard work may never reach your exacting standards. It can also prevent you from trying new things for fear that you won’t get them perfect straight way.

Criticism: If you have imposter syndrome, you may find it difficult to deal with negative feedback or criticism, becoming defensive and needing to justify your actions or decisions. If you already feel like the proverbial swan, gliding on the surface but splashing around underneath to stay afloat, then criticism can be difficult to take.

Praise: Similar to having difficulty taking criticism, it can be tough to take praise when your mind is convinced you’re an imposter. You may feel good knowing your hard work has been recognised, but internally you’re telling yourself you don’t deserve it as you’re just pretending and not really worthy of the praise at all!

Making comparisons: We’ve all felt it, sitting on that online conference feeling like everyone else knows more than we do, comparing ourselves and feeling that they are far more skilled, knowledgeable, and successful than we will ever be.

So what can we do to over come this?

Firstly, it’s important to realise that people spend less time thinking about you and your behaviours than you realise! People are too busy with their own lives, families and workloads to be too concerned about your feelings of ‘fake it till you make it’! Here are some further steps you can take to mitigate the feelings of imposter syndrome and truly own your awesomeness!

• Find a mentor or coach. Having someone to chat with about the areas of your role that make you feel like an imposter can help you to identify what you can do to upskill in these areas, develop your knowledge and confidence. Moreover, you will realise you are not alone in feeling like this!

• Acknowledge negative self-talk. When those nagging doubts creep in, ask yourself if you would talk to a child or member of staff in that way? Shake off the negative doubts and remind yourself of all the wonderful skills you do have.

• Know your strengths. Make a list and leave it in a visible place. Identify all the kick ass awesome strengths that you bring to the table. Being able to see this when the negative self-talk comes in can really help.

• Recognise your areas for development. By knowing where you need to improve or upskill you are in control and can find ways to make that happen. This might be a course, some reading or just a chat with a professional that you need schedule to feel more confident in certain areas.

• Done is better than perfect. If perfection is getting in your way, remind yourself that getting something done is way better than waiting for perfection.

• Learn to be open to feedback and constructive criticism. Remember not to take it personally, this isn’t about you as a person, its about your job role and how you can improve.

• Welcome praise. Just a simple ‘thank you’ is all you need, take the praise, accept it as genuine and enjoy the feelings it brings!

• Get comfortable with being uncomfortable. This imposter syndrome feeling wont last for ever. As you grow into early years leadership, become more skilled and experienced you will feel less and less like an imposter. But you have to do the work and push through the uncomfortable and difficult challenges ahead.

Have you every felt like this? Share your experiences in the comments, we would love to hear from you

Kelly